What to say when… scripts for the hardest moments

Fewer words, more presence. Each script is short enough to remember mid-meltdown.

• What to say when screen time is over (without a meltdown)Exact words for ending screen time without tears: a warning, a choice and a soft landing, plus what to skip and why Dopa makes stopping so hard.
• What to say instead of “calm down” (and why it backfires)Why “calm down” backfires in a meltdown, and what to say instead: short, low-voice lines that help your child’s brain settle. Scripts included.
• What to say when your child hits youWhat to say when your child hits you: a short boundary in the moment, what to skip, and how to teach a safer way to show anger later.
• What to say instead of “you’re so smart” (praise that builds effort)Praise that builds effort: what to say instead of “you’re so smart”, with six swaps and the classic study on why intelligence praise can backfire.
• What to say when your child says “I can’t sleep”What to say when your child says “I can’t sleep”: calm, brief lines for 10 p.m., how to handle bedtime worries, and what to leave for morning.
• What to say after a meltdown: how to repair and reconnectWhat to say after a meltdown: comfort first, then simple words to reconnect, name what happened and repair, even if you were the one who yelled.
• How to talk to your child about puberty: what to say and whenHow to talk to your child about puberty: when to start, what to say, how to keep it short and calm, and what to do when you don’t know the answer.
• What to say to yourself after yelling at your kids (parent guilt)Parent guilt after yelling: six things to say to yourself, a 60-second step back, and how to repair with your child, even days later.

Educational content only, not medical advice. New pages are added as we write them. All guides · Meet the crew